Letters to a Lefty: Dear Social Justice Warrior

Welcome to part 2 of the "Letters to a Lefty" series. If you enjoy this style of writing, please let me know as I have plenty of archetypes I'd love to write to on the left, on the right, and everyone in between. Be sure to check out the first Letter to a Lefty here

Dear Social Justice Warrior,

It’s been quite some time since we have spoken.

I’m writing you to say I’m sorry – to apologize for sharing my feelings with you without first giving you a trigger warning. You see, it’s not you. It’s me. My mother always told me that sticks and stones may break my bones, but words will never hurt me. Turns out my mother was an idiot! I mean, words don’t hurt me, but apparently they are just the thing to push your victimization button.

But listen.

I need your help.

There are so many things I don’t understand about you, mostly due to your overwhelming logical fallacies and willful ignorance of facts and evidence. So help me understand.

Help me understand how to blame white people everything, including slavery and oppression of black people, even though it was white people who had the biggest role in ending it. Help me understand how white people are collectively responsible even though only 1.4 percent of white Americans owned slaves at the height of U.S. slavery. I guess I could ignore the fact that “in 2013, black criminals carried out 38% of murders, compared to 31.1% for whites, despite the fact that there are five times more white people in the U.S.” (infowars.com). Does that mean all blacks are responsible for murders in the U.S.?

Show me how to preach tolerance while at the same time using the state to bludgeon and bully opponents who disagree with me. I want you to show me how to use moral posturing, hysteria, and lynch mobs to rally against people with opinions different from my own. Unfortunately, I’ll need your help getting rehabilitated, because I’ve grown so accustomed to making my case by using facts and logic and intellect.

Teach me how to puff out my chest and fight battles that have already been won decades ago. I want to know how to willfully ignore the real issues in the world (such as dominant cultures that are actually oppressive to women and minorities, the fact that the majority of people are still hitting their children, etc.).

I want so badly to worship at the shrine of Che Guevera and the Marxists and the Nihilists. I want to feel the moral self-congratulations you receive when you hop on Twitter, voice your opinion, and then immediately sink into another Netflix series to forget about the people your heart bled for just moments before. I want to learn how to invent enemies so I can feel heroic without actually doing anything to further the advancement of a peaceful society.

And you, my friend, have such an artful way of shutting people down with your constant use of political correctness and getting offended. It’s like a knee-buckling one-two punch that brings your enemies down and removes their constitutional right to free speech without actually removing the amendment from the books.

I realize you have good intentions. And even though they’re filtered through the all-too-common filter of short-sightedness, I still recognize a good heart when I see one. I know you want to help. I know you want to save the world from itself – to put safety foam on the corners of every table – to put protectors on every electrical outlet – to be society’s helicopter parent.­­­

I have checked my privilege.

I have seen the light.

Kind Regards,
Daniel Wagner
Tweet me @unframeofmind

Dumb Myths and Smart Facts About Slavery http://www.vice.com/read/hey-v12n5
Black Crime Facts that the White Liberal Media Daren’t Talk About http://www.infowars.com/black-crime-facts-that-the-white-liberal-media-darent-talk-about/